"The recommend daily requirement for hugs: four per day for survival, eight per day for
maintenance, and twelve per day for growth."
Relationships are bittersweet -- full of love and pain at once. In relationship counseling, you gain the opportunity to explore both. Through work and play, you'll learn different ways of communicating and expressing yourself. You learn how to make boundaries to forge closeness and adopt new skills to grow empathy between you. The aim here is for each one to accept responsibility for his or her behavior rather than to focus on each other's flaws. We all want to feel safe and secure, heard and seen, and accepted unconditionally for who we are. In relationship counseling, you will cultivate honesty and the art of showing up with all your resources to connect with your partner in an atmosphere of kindness. The result is a rewarding, balanced, reciprocally trusting relationship.
Besides my training and practice, I bring the experience of 15 years of marriage and 2 children to my practice. I integrate elements from Emotional Couples Therapy (EFT), attachment theory, and Gottman's methods to facilitate successful marriages and partnerships. You’ll be encouraged to enhance your bond through compassionate communication; you'll also be challenged to expose the dynamics that are calling for attention. Connection is the cornerstone to building intimacy, trust, and relational resilience. When you begin to discover your partner in the here and now, you can focus on what matters most to you both.
I support couples in being a loving, nurtured relationship again. I work with relational, premarital, marital, same-sex couples, intimacy and sexual issues, commitment fears, family lineage obstacles, trauma history, separation, divorce, infidelity and other betrayals, pregnancy, birth, post-partum and other transitions.
Families are our seeds and our roots in this life. They form the primary influences on our conditioning and the foundation of our identities. I'm trained in Family Systems Therapy and Structural Family Therapy which focuses on the complex dynamic of the entire family, not just an individual psyche. A change in one part of the system often creates health elsewhere. The underlying theory here suggests that individuals cannot be understood in isolation from one another, but rather in the totality of their system. "The whole is greater than the sum of its parts." A family is an emotional unit comprised of interconnected and interdependent individuals and is the primary context of where we come from and who we become. Context organizes us: our behaviors are influenced and patterned by our relations with others.
Starting with the old scripts we carry — full of projections, judgments, assumptions and fears — we examine what's not working. We co-create a supportive and safe environment for discovery, respecting the needs of all. Through courageous communication and other skills, family members shed outworn roles and can start to listen again and respond, rather than react to old triggers. Interpersonal patterns are now free to become more adaptive, productive interactions.
I assist families in shifting from discord to harmony so that they can enjoy each other again. I work with parent-child relationships, sibling relationships, adolescent issues, communication break downs, parenting issues, illness and death in families, divorce, blended families, extended families, pregnancy, birth, post-partum and other transitions.